One of the Hardest things we ever do

Have you ever trusted someone--thought they were your friend only to receive a dreadful blow as a result? Many of us, probably the majority of us in varying degrees, have been deeply hurt by another... maybe by a former spouse, or an abuser who took us by surprise and made our world seem much less safe.

God never asks anything of us unless it is for our good, our growth and enhancement in preparation for the larger picture-- say eternity. “You have heard it said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, love your enemies,” (Jesus in Matthew 5: 43-45). Wow! Imagine it! Such a tall order. Yet, we can succeed at “letting it go” by setting our wills to forgive that person (as many times as it takes). Otherwise, this matter can lie on our souls like battery acid. Therefore, the inability to let a matter go will continue to hurt us deeply.

So how do we “love our enemies?” The mere thought of “that individual” can be painful. Well, Jesus said to pray for them. I did this in two very hurtful situations within my life and found I did not think of it as “loving” those two persons, but that action no doubt was seen as being loving in God's sight. That act of setting my will to “let God be God,” as per my being harmed, then to pray for my enemy to change—actually changed me—by giving me a sense of freedom.

Believe me, that effort took a lot of work to bring me to the place where I could genuinely pray for the souls of those two. This was not easy or short-lived. However my determination to pray for them to reconsider their behaviors—for the sake of others as well as for their eternal good--worked wonders. I could finally let go of the hurt. This brought strength to me once it was fully worked through.

You might ask, “How can I do that? I was brutally harmed?” With God’s help we can do anything. And we cannot hide from ourselves, saying “It doesn’t matter.” It does greatly matter to our souls! Being honest with how deeply we were hurt is vitally important. Telling our story to a counselor, a pastor, a priest or a rabbi is vitally important as well. This helps us to shove it up and out of our souls... given time, we can let it go.

The saying “let go and let God,” truly helps us realize that we cannot change what happened and we cannot change anyone. But God can.

Forgiveness helped me to keep telling myself that God was with me and kept me alive. Being alive is a very great gift... having the ability to finish my growth, becoming who I could grow into being is priceless.

Old memories do arise. They come back. I use a visualization that shows me kicking that memory (not the person) in the hinney, seeing the memory fly out of my mind. The unconscious mind is where healing is needed. That is the part of one’s mind that responds to the images we give it. On the other hand, our minds give us pictures through dreams, mental images and sometimes visions.

Taking the path of becoming all God knew we could be when we were first conceived opens the door to becoming a “magnificent me.” Yes, it works to think highly of ourselves. It supports our being as wholesome as we can be.

Try it. You will like it!